Ego is the Enemy – Part 1: Aspire

This section of the book begins with an introduction on the teachings of Isocrates to his student Demonicus, who was young and ambitious. However, the path of ambition can be dangerous and Demonicus is informed to practice self-control and refrain from haughtiness “and that the best thing which we have in ourselves is good judgement.”

Isocrates’ teachings remained relevant throughout history and had influenced one of the greatest generals of the United States, William Tecumseh Sherman.

“Among men who rise to fame and leadership two types are recognizable—those who are born with a belief in themselves and those in whom it is a slow growth dependent on actual achievement. To the men of the last type their own success is a constant surprise, and its fruits the more delicious, yet to be tested cautiously with a haunting sense of doubt whether it is not all a dream. In that doubt lies true modesty, not the sham of insincere self-depreciation but the modesty of “moderation,” in the Greek sense. It is poise, not pose.”

Our cultural values almost try to make us dependent on validation, entitled, and ruled by our emotions. For a generation, parents and teachers have focused on building up everyone’s self-esteem. From there, the themes of our gurus and public figures have been almost exclusively aimed at inspiring, encouraging, and assuring us that we can do whatever we set our minds to. In reality, this makes us weak.

One might say that the ability to evaluate one’s own ability is the most important skill of all. Without it, improvement is impossible. And certainly ego makes it difficult every step of the way. It is certainly more pleasurable to focus on our talents and strengths, but where does that get us? Arrogance and self-absorption inhibit growth. So does fantasy and “vision.”

You must practice seeing yourself with a little distance, cultivating the ability to get out of your own head. Detachment is a sort of natural ego antidote. It’s easy to be emotionally invested and infatuated with your own work. Any and every narcissist can do that. What is rare is not raw talent, skill, or even confidence, but humility, diligence, and self-awareness. For your work to have truth in it, it must come from truth. If you want to be more than a flash in the pan, you must be prepared to focus on the long term.

Understand that though we think big, we must act and live small in order to accomplish what we seek. Be action and education focused, and forgo validation and status, and from this, our ambition will not be grandiose but iterative—one foot in front of the other, learning and growing and putting in the time.